_ It's the last; it's the first; it's the best. It's number one, ichiban. It's the greatest. It's new and improved, three times faster than the fastest. It's you, Bobby; it's all you - your life, your times, your oyster.
_ Bobby ain't here. He's wrestling with some tertiary life-forms. He's attempting, yet again, to climb out of the gutter. He knows... Bobby knows... and that's why he doesn't quit. It's in with the bad air and out with the good when Bobby fills his balloon. He floats far, far away. It was long ago he untethered his balloon from the pack and no one has seen him since. He don't quit - he can't. He sold something he doesn't - didn't - own: his soul.
_ I should slap your face.
A mirror appeared out of nowhere. A face was slapped. It, strange as it may seem, was the wrong face.
_ I hope you feel better.
_ It's enough to feel. Let's not get into good, better and best.
_ It's San Andreas fault.
_ Sam? Sam Andreas? The Sam Andreas?
_ San.
_ Oh.
_ Oh?
_ That's right.
_ I should punch you in the nose.
A mirror appeared out of nowhere. A nose was punched. It, strange as it may seem, was the wrong nose.
_ I hope you feel better.
_ It's enough to feel. Let's not get into good, better and best.
_ It's Yoko Ono's fault.
_ Southside! Johnnie South Dakota! Cure me of this madness. Drip, drip, drip. It's loading in like left-handed relations come the dark days of early summer. Drip, drip, drip. Save me, Sausage, save my slithering soul.
_ Oh my gawd. OMG. I can't stand it anymore! I wanna bust out of this prison, see what life is like on the outside. Hand me the wrench of wrenches!
_ Here's a blunt head screwdriver.
_ It looks like a ball-pean hammer.
_ It's a chicken without a head. Use it to bash down the walls, like Barnacle Bill did with his balls.
A wall appeared out of nowhere. Someone hit Barnacle Bill in the balls with a ball-pean hammer. He - Barnacle Bill - wished they were the wrong balls.
_ Pean. His fur resembled ermine, with black flecks of gold on the ground.
_ Herman?
_ She ain't here. A winsome lass - hair everywhere.
_ Why I oughta sock you in the eye.
An eye appeared out of nowhere. Someone socked a wall. It, strange as it may seem, was the wrong mirror.
_ Look! It's the One without a second!
_ Where?
_ Here.
_ Here?
_ Here.
_ I'm more better. I thought I was lost. That was scary.
_ Scary? Indiana? La-la-la-la-larry. Larry? Larry Indiana. Please report to the poop deck.
_ Where?
_ I don't know where. I couldn't say for sure. Maybe in the ana. It's windy they-a. Windy, leading to confusion.
_ What do you know?
_ Nothing. All I know is that it was somewhere; and it was scary. But I'm more better, honest.
_ You know what this means, don't you?
_ If it's different from anything I've thought, said, or did, no. No, I don't.
_ No?
_ You heard me. No.
_ Yes. Of course I heard you. Are you implying that I am not listening?
_ How could I? I've kissed a lot of turnbuckles. I, apart from thinking, saying and doing, don't know how to imply.
_ Say something and mean something else.
_ What?
_ You heard me. Say something but mean something else. It's easy.
_ But? But-but-but-but-but.... What? You think it's hard? Are you calling me a liar?
_ Why I oughta reach down your throat and pull out your esophagus.
A mirror was produced. It seemed to appear out of nowhere. An esophagus was pulled out of a mirror. It was the right throat but, strangely enough, it was the wrong esophagus. Tertiary life-forms applauded from the gutter. A dessert cart backed out of the mirror. It contained much in the way of comestibles. One of the men pointed to a plate. Strangely enough it was the wrong man. Nevertheless he pointed to a plate.
_ Is that where Napoleon pulled his bone apart?
_ It certainly looks like it.
_ I'll have two.
_ I'll have the One without a second.
_ Bastard! I was gonna have that.
_ Chai.
_ Large, with extra texture. I'm watching her figure.
***********
..... History is an exercise. It builds big muscles, some in the head.
..... Pasty old woman swinging one arm while she walks. She was eaten up by the mirror, like a diamond in the dark. What to do?
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